On Wednesday’s we highlightHER .👑
This week we are featuring my very best friend Whitney Oney. She is a single mother who has overcome every obstacle set against her. Her son’s passion for education and commitment to sports, exemplify the type of mother she is. She sacrificed 2 years of weekends to help build her and her son a home. Once she completed that goal, she sacrificed being at her sons games and practices to attend nursing school, which she recently graduated. Whitney didn’t let being single stop her from looking at the bigger picture. She talks about allowing people to help her, which is difficult for a lot of us women. She talks about the feeling of guilt, that we all can relate to when we are taking time from those we love to accomplish something for our self. BUT through it all, she knew she had someone looking up to her, watching her every move. What he saw; persistence, passion, commitment. Whitney talks about being open with her son and including him in the importance of her goals. I thank Whitney for sharing her story in hopes to empower other women out there to not be a product of your circumstance, but instead using it as motivation to get everything meant for you. THERE SHE GO!
If you could use a quote to describe who Whitney is, what quote would it be?
‘“She believed she could, so she did.” A quote that has been seen many times, and recited on many occasions. To me, it’s the mere fact of me believing in myself being the first step to conquering what I’ve accomplished and what’s to come. Knowing that whatever I set my heart out to do can be done! And believing in myself despite the circumstances around me.”
What are some of the things you cherish most in life?
“What I cherish the most in life is family and time spent. I’ve been blessed with a supportive and loving group of people, and that’s something I could never take for granted. Time is something we can never get back. Every moment spent together or talking from a distance is precious. I’ve lost some people who I was blessed to have for many years of my life; I will always have memories of good moments in time. I’ve instilled the value of family and time with my son, and I’m proud of creating a lasting legacy.”
What is your passion in life and how are you pursuing it?
“My passion is nursing with the ultimate goal of becoming a Nurse Practitioner; specializing as a nurse midwife. Ever since I can remember it’s been a constant goal I’ve been wanting to reach. As we all know sometimes life just happens, but I’m more determined than ever to chase my dream. I recently completed the LPN program and I’m currently enrolled in the PN-RN. With a few more “N’s” to go I’ll get there. I’ve learned to ditch the timeline and believe in the magic of the timing of your life.” “Don’t undermine your milestones because you expect to go further faster; it’s the surest way to run in place.”
Being a single mother, how hard has it been to chase your dreams?
“Being a mother isn’t easy and does not come with a manual. Being a single mother isn’t easy and has its own set of challenges. I went into my journey knowing sacrifices had to made; financially as well as physically. It wasn’t easy, but faith and determination got us through! My biggest hurdle was the feeling of guilt. I felt guilty for spending so much time with school, missing practices and games, and spending time away from my son. As a very present and active mother, this was one of the hardest challenges. I broke at the thought of him feeling like he was last or forgotten. It took a while for me to adjust to the changes, but hearing him talk to me or others about being proud of me, let me know that he understood. We had our own little countdown until my last day, we made it! It was something he didn’t even know I needed. A sister friend once told me;” This is a short time out of a lifetime” that stuck with me through it all.”
What encouragement can you give to other single mothers, who find it impossible to have their own life?
‘“Single mom” does not equate to end of life! Ladies, there is so much that can still be done. You can’t escape sacrifices, you have to be willing to face them head on. Balance is key! Find a rhythm or schedule that is conducive to you and your child/children. Welcome in help or as we call it “the village”. This was tough for me, because I’m naturally a “I’ve got it” type of woman. Be strong in whatever you set out to do! And most importantly remember who you are doing it for! Mothering and chasing dreams can be taxing. Remember to schedule in “me time”; whatever that looks like to you. You deserve it! We as single mothers can use this circumstance as a crutch or as motivation. It’s up to us which path we choose!”
What or Who has been your biggest motivation in life and why?
“My son is my motivation to keep going! He’s watching and learning through me. So, I owe it to myself and him to make the necessary happen. Wanting more out of life for us has ultimately pushed me to strive harder, and to become a better me.”
How does faith take the forefront in your life?
“Faith is believing that what is for you will be yours no matter what your current situation looks like. It’s knowing that what you can’t see happening now can still be achieved. Having this mind set has gotten me through many life challenges. It’s easy to look at your current situation and get defeated. This is where I was for a long time, but I had to change my way of thinking and believing. Keeping faith at the forefront, God, and hustle; allowed me to always keep the bigger picture in mind.” “Faith is unseen but felt, faith is strength we feel when we have none, faith is hope when all seems lost.”
Going to school, working and most importantly being a mother, what does “me-time” mean and look like to you?
“Mother. Student. Employee, etc.…are all full time tasks within itself. All of which take so much of me, but what about me? My “me time” ranges from pampering days, reading, taking rides with my favorite music blasting, to sitting back in peace and quiet watching my favorite shows. Spending time with me doing whatever brings me peace. I had to learn that this was not selfish but essential. We as women give so much to those around us, but remember you cannot pour from an empty cup.”
Why does empowering women mean so much to you?
“Women empowerment is something I’ve always sat back and wished would genuinely thrive. To me, it’s important that I help change the narrative of the nature of women when it comes to each other. We all know we are stronger together, but it’s more than just saying it. It’s time that we start empowering through our actions. You don’t have to be an influencer to influence. From sharing moments of success to uplift the next woman, a simple compliment, offering support, or just being kind. Sometimes all the next woman needs to know is that they’re not alone. We’ve all been through the ups and down of life. Try to Encourage instead of judge, support instead of being catty, and reach back instead of looking down. Women are really reclaiming their time! We can all win!”
If you could leave women with a quote of inspiration, what would it be?
“Trust the wait. Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming.”