The first thing we need to understand about love is it’s not all glitz and glamour. Social media sometimes portrays that love should be extravagant and the look of perfection. When in reality, in love there are going to be times when it gets tough. Tough times meaning when you aren’t communicating, financial hardships putting pressure on your relationship, you’ve let an argument about laundry escalate to days of the silent treatment. Lol. But seriously! Tough times are more than the infidelity and lies people think of. Expecting perfection is setting yourself up for disappointment. Someone once told me “the perfect person for you is out there, the perfect relationship is not.” I didn’t understand that until I got older.
The most special thing about love, in my opinion, is it’s uniqueness to everyone. One of my favorite authors Alex Elle wrote “we must keep in mind that love tastes different to everyone.” That has forever stuck with me because it’s true. I need love in different ways than my husband. Even in my circle of friends, the way we all crave love is different. I think that’s important to remember. We shouldn’t feel bad about the way we require to be loved. Only communicate it and stand firm by it. We have to respect the love language of others as well. When people don’t show love the way we do, we tend to think it isn’t there.
The most important thing about love, to me, is how u love yourself. We can’t expect someone to pick up the pieces we don’t love about ourselves, that creates insecurity when they don’t. Loving yourself means knowing yourself. All of yourself. Knowing how you need to be loved. That weeds out the bullshit! Then we aren’t looking for love to pick up the broken pieces. It’s not a void. We aren’t so easily coerced into thinking love exists where it doesn’t. Love isn’t just based on how someone appeals to our insecurities. Love is deeper than that. When we don’t know who we are, we don’t love ourselves and we don’t know how we deserved to be loved, we allow ourself to be played. Pick up these gems I’m dropping ladies!
This week I challenge you to love yourself, all of you. Learn your love language and what love truly means to you and keep an open mind that love will not be perfection. Be in control of how you choose to be loved, by yourself as well as by others. THERE SHE GO!